quarter is almost over.

to say that these last few weeks haven't been stressful would be the understatement of the year. the end of the winter quarter is here and I have about one week left. I having been working my butt off trying to pass theses college classes, since passing high school depends on it. but of course i'm pretty sure I failed all of them. I don't think that I'm smart enough to get my AA since I can't complete simple algebra without a calculator. I find out next week what my grades where and if I will be able to graduate on time. its ridicules, I'm definitely regretting doing running start and working. speaking of work. I still have a job, which is nice and not so nice at the same time. I don't like feeling manipulated (something I get a lot at home) and I definitely feel that from work.

so since my "incident" at work I get to decide to give them 100$ (did u feel the sarcasm) I have this next week off. however I'm on call, which means they call call me anytime and have me come in and work, so I have no warning before. I also am on cash suspension, So I will either be washing tables for 3 months are learning how to make some burgers. I'm hoping for the burger assembly, since i am not a huge fan of being in lobby.

the only thing that I am stressed about lately is that I'm working hard to be a good person, do the right thing, get good grades, be a good employe and such, and all these things are happening to me. not only am i getting in trouble, but people think that I'm slacking and being bad. if karma was here I would like to slap her in the face.

I'm hoping that this monday, I will be able to get back on track and get things moving towards a positive place. I'm hoping that my mom will be able to get me a membership at golds so that I can start working out. its getting harder to work out now since the weather is getting worse and people are getting busy. with a gym I wouldn't have to worry about that.

Advocare update: I have 3 days left. I'm not going to update my weight or inches lost until I'm complete done.

im kinda annoyed at myself for waisting so much money and I have learned that "programs" are not my things. Iv been having stomach pain and just feeling blah. hopefully I can get back and start eating and working out how I was before and will be able to feel better. I know that advocate has helped me jump that block I had before and Im thankful for that.

Ten day challenge Completed.

Today is my 11th day of the 24 day advocate challenge. I completed the 10 day cleanse. I have to admit that I did good for most of the food choices but I did slip up. My Home is the worlds hardest place to be when on a "diet".. My parents managed to have pizza for dinner three times during my cleanse and my mom went thanksgiving shopping. donuts, cookies, extremely sugary cereals, junk food, junk food, junked food. I looked and I don't think she bought any fruit or healthy food. the frustrating thing is that she never used to buy these things. I think that she has caved and buys food that please my younger brothers who are the most unhealthy eaters I know. amiss all this craziness, I only slipped up a few times and broke the cleanse. I think my plan is that when I feel tempted to eat food or just can't get full I'm going to go for a jog. we will see how that works. starting these last 14 days feels pretty good. to start it off with a bang I'm going to go run a 5k, turkey trot with my sisters. Happy thanksgiving!

I'm not going to announce my measurement progress until the end of the 24 challenge. since losing weight during the cleanse isn't that significant. I'm going to continue trying to make healthy eating choices since this is a life style change not a binge (SP) diet.

Starting Weight(2 months ago): 150 Pounds

Current weight: 135 Pounds

I have to admit that I was pretty excited to be where I am. I know that I lost 15 pounds, but I'm a little disappointed that no one seams to notice, besides my family. All that i ask from my friends is for them to notice and say Quote: "dang Emmy, you are looking sooooo skinny and sexy. you are so awesome for losing 15 pounds." ha, that would be nice. maybe its just because its winter and its hard to tell. I'm just going to have to get healthy so that i hear those words.

I have to admit I went a little crazy with my "reward"...

here is what I got.

Elf- essential Brushes- 10 piece

Elf-Eyeshadow palette- 32 piece

day#5. half way through the ten day phase!

it is day five. I am half way through my ten day challenge. thankfully the rest of my supplies arrived in the mail so I don't have to worry about transitioning into the last 14 days. hopefully I will be able to keep up with all the things I need to take. looking forward for my sister and brother in law to begin, it will be easier to know that someone is in a similar situation and we can support each other more. I do feel pretty supported by my family.

Accomplishments!!!! jumped on the scale this morning, and I am now at 135 pounds. 15 pounds lost so far and 4 of those pounds are thanks to Advocare.

I am a firm believer in weighing your -self everyday. it definitely keeps me motivated and lets me know where Im at, I hate not knowing and being in the dark.

I have to admit that I have slipped up a little bit and eaten a little forbidden food, not on purpose just unknowingly. however, I'm going to double check my foods now and make sure I follow the rules perfectly.

thats just a short update on my progress. :)

also; progress reward system;

when i lost 10 pounds i got a facial, so i need to find something to reward myself with. hmmmm hahaha

here we go. day #1-2

Its been a crazy couple weeks. I have been spending a lot more time with my sister MaryAnn and feel like we have gotten a lot closer. planning my dads Egyptian party was a little stressful but it was so much better having the help of my creative sister. while we where hanging out she mentioned a health program that her and Benj where starting called Advocare. at first I was thinking that it was cool that they where doing it, then I was thinking what the heck I want to do it to! haha so 3 days later I am prepared to start and monday Nov 14 I began. I know it sounds like I am obsessed with my weight, lets face it, I am. :) it controls my happiness and the possibility of me getting into the military. I did lose the 10 pounds and kept it of.. and iv been working out like a beast. me and Foxy Roxy are running about 4 miles at least 4 time a week now. but iv been getting lazy and don't really know how to eat healthy. so this program seamed like a good jump start to start losing more pounds. it seams like everyone around here is trying to and actually working at it, which makes it fun. I always feel slightly competitive so hopefully I win (as in get the best results... haha

so day one of the 24 advocate challenge was pretty interesting. the spark Energy drink that your supposed to drink was so nasty and I almost died drinking it along with the fiber drink. so I created a system of sticking toilet paper up my nose and taking it like a man. haha the pills are also pretty big and I try my best not to choke on them. that would stink if I died doing this thing. I at least wanna go out in a cool way. the spark drink is cool though, cause it really does give you energy my personal crack, is what iv been told. its pretty awesome. haha its only day one and I'm out of food ideas, I am most likely going to go online and look up cool recipes to make, cooking up a storm. I know that Rachel will love that, I have her in mind every time i do. its because I love her. :)

so here we go 23 more days!!!! bring it on.

another crazy week.

since my mom has gotten out of here hip replacement surgery and is recovering she has to have physical therapy at least 3 times a week, add that to school, work, studying, and trying to work out as much as possible, I pretty much have a hard time fitting everything in and giving my school assignments 100%. I'v definitely noticed myself doing worse in school lately. it kinda sucks but this is life. I just hope that she will be willing to give me gas money for driving her around. doubtful though, my family isn't really a giving community when it comes to gas. in the meeting my mom was telling her therapist that she wanted to be driving soon. someone grab a shotgun and shoot me in the head real quick. its not that I'm being a total brat about it, I just don't feel safe when A.) she has to lift her leg to set it on the gas or brake (this was even before the surgery) and b.) she can't even get herself in and out of the car by herself. her having to use the car is just going to be stressfull especially with time management (since she is always late and not reliable.)

don't judge me, this is the only time I get to bitch and moan about annoying things (I'm sure that others would tell you different.)

on a lighter note, this concludes ( is that the right word?) week 3 of operation; loose lots of weight so I can finally fit into my first sexy swim suit and get super sexy strong. haha long tittle i know. so the results are in from weighing myself everyday. (its a bad habit) and I'v lost 10 pounds. I also ran 2 miles today with my friend Roxy, without stopping... impressive... I'm a beast... and I can lift 10 pounds on the bar in the gym. oh yea!!! haha. so I know weigh 140 pounds yea..

to celebrate my tiny accomplishment I am rewarding myself with my first ever facial.

the sad thing though is that I can't tell that I'v lost any weight, hopefully when I loose more it will be more noticeable, And I won't have to avoid walking near the mirrors in the gym anymore. you know you do it too. unless of course you've got a nice body.

I'm also back at square one on where the heck I'm going after i graduate... we will see what happens.

This has been a short glimpse into the crazy life of an average teenager.

blah!

I am sitting here at Kadlec with my mom I'v been here for and hour and a half so far (I think All of my readers would appreciate the) ... watching an unknown movie on TV, with Bill Murray, and John Candy, its pretty funny, its about them joining the Army.

It kinda makes me think more about joining since its pretty much on my mind all the time. I went to The Marine Recruiting Station to work out with foxy Roxy for the first time and almost died. It made me really want to quite. I don't exactly have a good history of sticking with things. i'm pretty much a quitter. But I'm going to stick with this for now.

I'm kinda sick of being over weight. Its about time I can look at a photo of myself thats below the neck and be happy about it. I heard that the first step to losing weight is to let people know so that you feel more ashamed when you fail. well I made the last part up, but its pretty much true. so here we go. I topped this year off by weighing 150 flippen pounds. I figure if I never told people how much I weigh i wasn't that big, but the truth is its kinda obvious. so I lost 5 pounds on my own so far and am at a wooping 145 PNDS. I have to lose 2o PNDS to even slightly qualify for the Military. So I will be working out and eating "better" So if you see my eating junk food or sitting on my butt yell at me to get my "Ass in gear," something that always gets me moving and laughing when my "personal trainer" yells at me when we run. your probably also wondering why I have a very suggestive picture of a hotty on my page... because this is my inspiration. haha don't judge me. I'v gotta dream big

So week 2 of working out (being permanently sore also) and kinda eating better and i'v lost 1 pound! yes!!!!!! I'm a beast, no need to tell me.

anyhow back to the hospital, I'm with mom and she's in a really good mood, laughing (the movie is pretty funny) and being the mommy that I love.... I think that her new hip is a big chunk of her good mood, she's pretty excited to being better, or improved. maybe its the absence of my brothers that has her stress free. maybe someone would be willing to take them forever? any passing by creepy vans interested? oh man have i gone to far? haha.

excited for my Andy roo to come back home in a couple weeks, and to work with MaryAnn on the surprise Daddy party... and if this gets out I know who I will have to interrogate. all 2 of you be warned.

things fall into place...

It has been a really long time since I have posted anything, and its mostly because I could not think of what to say or most importantly how to write it down. this post most likely will be a jumble of things. but thats how I usually am anyway. :) a jumble of random things.

I'd like to dedicate this random part to my Family... even though they are skilled in the annoying catagory i love them. the hardest part about leaving or deciding to leave after high school is that I won't be able to see them or watch my Nieces grow up. or that my brothers won't help my mom and ignore her, how will she get around? I'm the only one who can drive the younger ones around since dad works all the time... THEY NEED ME!!!!! I might be being a tad bit overly dramatic but i'm entitled to it at least 5 times a day as a teenage girl, with no judgment. I do hope that I am over reacting and that they will be fine when I leave.

I just found out that my almost sister in law/ brothers Fiancé fell and lost her baby that she was expecting with my brother. I hope that things will work out and that they will both be happy.

"life isn't about the trials we have, its how we react to them"

I hope that they can move on and work even harder to be together or to do what they need to be happy, what ever life has in store for them.

I'm taking the ASVEB today... and I'm pretty nervous!